and forgetting how to be a student.
twisting ends of shoulder length hair,
feelin' strange and not pretty and very
awkward and saying the wrong thing.
making lists and plans and looking at
new neighborhoods and gathering
information and getting up in the
morning to write, write, write.
feeling like a little ugly duckling or a
little ugly bug, just wandering, always.
talking things out with dee and staying
up late with the boys and laughing at
tv shows and making skits and inviting
people to do theater in my living room.
thinking about bathing suits and beer
and boyfriends and bridesmaid emails
and looking for dresses and heels and
hair clips. being distracted and happy
and then i have a sad sad stomach ache,
its all okay, i'll be okay. soon i'll live by a
park with a lake and i'm going to plant
a rose tree and put peach roses in a vase.
i promise.
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