Thursday, April 29, 2010

ma visage

i'm frustrated and confused
and feeling frustrated at my face
(and my arms and my neck and my tummy)
at wanting a beautiful face
and why face really matters
why do our faces really matter?
i communicate with my face
people have to look at my face and when
they look at my face they perceive it to
be the essence of me
my face
and my mouth
the way that i speak the way that i
speak to people

Monday, April 26, 2010

paris and couches and michelle

i'm doing homework for what might possibly be the last time in a very long time. but i'm thinking about here and more specifically, here. i also thought about this. i met someone new from here. and now i'm just trying to think of stars and planets and space shuttles, trying to get everything done. grow up and be happy.

monday monday

*hollyweird showcase
*dutch apple streusel
*self portrait

Sunday, April 18, 2010

Saturday, April 17, 2010

penny lane

where i'll end up, well i think, only god really knows


did it take long to find me?
i ask the faithful light
oh, did it take long to find me?
and, are you gonna stay the night?


Friday, April 16, 2010

friday list and,

*summer skin
*listening to wilco
*middle part
*one year ago today
*18 months

stars and tom petty

eighteen months and i have to do
homework to move forward.
i have to remember that play
to want to continue to move forward.
nighttime hours and grimy teeth
and a tummy ache and not being
focused and saying things like 'i wish.'
greasy hair in my face and your face
and my friends are all real great they're
all moving away. northern oregon and
colorado and new york city and some
are coming back from islands like
the united kingdom and catalina
gonna tell me about their trip.
she is in kathmandu with raindrops
and mats and babies that won't ever
eat, too skinny and pictures of stars
and studying the stars and its funny
i always think of her when i look at the
stars or hear tom petty on the radio.

Thursday, April 15, 2010

ugly duckling ugly bug

i'm remembering summer adventures
and forgetting how to be a student.
twisting ends of shoulder length hair,
feelin' strange and not pretty and very
awkward and saying the wrong thing.
making lists and plans and looking at
new neighborhoods and gathering
information and getting up in the
morning to write, write, write.
feeling like a little ugly duckling or a
little ugly bug, just wandering, always.
talking things out with dee and staying
up late with the boys and laughing at
tv shows and making skits and inviting
people to do theater in my living room.
thinking about bathing suits and beer
and boyfriends and bridesmaid emails
and looking for dresses and heels and
hair clips. being distracted and happy
and then i have a sad sad stomach ache,
its all okay, i'll be okay. soon i'll live by a
park with a lake and i'm going to plant
a rose tree and put peach roses in a vase.
i promise.

Saturday, April 10, 2010


"kiss me and you will see how important i am."
..sylvia plath

my own box

blue asphalt at dusk,
white flowers blooming
across the street,
discussing film in the
garage and feminist
theory in the kitchen.
bell bottoms and velvet,
coffee-needing eyelids
and wine-searching lips.
and her hips.
jagged and daring, incidentally
baring; unhooked.
maybe there will never be
enough time and maybe we
are old enough now.
waking up everyday and putting
myself into my own box.
big ideas like new years
resolutions, brilliant and
positive and impossible and
so dreamy, so empowering, so
utterly dripping with something
there, something that's just there.
euphoric lenses of a one saturday night
we think we'll always remember,
always getting lost, always lost and
indistinguishable from the next.
your best friend gives you a wink
and a laugh, it's a beautiful memory
always getting lost, but not void of
and what does it mean when
uncanny coincidences don't
turn out to determine a
remarkable fate?

Friday, April 9, 2010

one sweet dream


+uwem akpan
+self portrait
+"you never can
tell with bees"

Thursday, April 8, 2010



trying to think of my own
stories, ones about
reading winnie the pooh
and trying to read
even cowgirls get the blues
and all of a sudden,
summer hues.
kids voices echo in the street
and june might be a new
transition to meet, and
pink dresses on her
shoulders keep
in the upward steady
climb of the warm
weather outside.
and emails from boston
stephanie and providence
rachel, with ideas and
pictures and yes,
pretty girl, yes yes,
i tell them. my friends
are all getting married and i
don't always know how i feel
but its beautiful anyway,
and all the pretty dresses and
all the warm weather,
lemonade sipping,
yes, i do.